When Your Mess Turns Into Your Message

"Heal me, O Lord, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise." Jeremiah 17:14 (NIV)

My brother is a recovered addict. For twenty years, he was absent from our family due to addiction issues. Countless times we thought he was dead, and according to statistics, he should have been.

However, God happens to be in the restoration business. He is willing to restore and heal all who come to Him. It doesn't matter who you are, what you've done, or what has been done to you. God is willing and able to turn any tragedy into triumph. My brother is living proof.

After entering many programs with hopes of success and end results of failure, my brother finally found the answer: Jesus. It wasn't until my brother met the Lord that healing and true change occurred. Suddenly, all things became new.

What's most exciting is anyone can experience this kind of freedom!

The truth is, we don't have the strength, will power, or ability to free ourselves from bondage no matter what the bondage is—drugs, lust, gluttony, pride, anger, or fear. Until we renounce our sickness and surrender to Christ, we will never experience freedom. On the other hand, when we are willing to give King Jesus our mess, He turns it into our message.

Not a day goes by that my brother doesn't look for opportunities to brag on God and share His message of hope.

Take a few summers ago, for example. One evening, our families gathered for dinner at Red Lobster. His treat! Twenty-six year old Tiffany was our server. Right away, we noticed two things about Tiffany. She was a natural with people, and she was very pregnant. While we enjoyed her kind service, we had no idea that God would turn the tables and call us to serve her in a unique way.

It started when my sister refused to allow my brother to buy her dinner. While my sister loves to give to others, she's not so good on the receiving end. I, on the other hand, understood that it gave my brother great pleasure to pick up the check. The Lord knows I didn't want to deny him his blessing!

Poor Tiffany found herself caught in the middle of the argument. Eager to win, my brother said to our server, "You see, I was a drug addict for years. During that time, my sisters did a lot for me. Now, I just want to bless them as they have blessed me."

Tiffany's eyes widen. "You were a drug addict?" she inquired. "I would have never guessed."

"Yes. I was," my brother replied. "But Jesus changed all that." From there he told Tiffany his life-changing story.

"I went from being lost to being found; from being homeless to being a homeowner; from being an employee to owning my own business; from being bound by drugs to being set free in Christ."

Tears filled Tiffany's eyes as we shared God's love with her. That's not all. Later that week, we confirmed God's love to her by presenting her with a baby gift.

Oh, friends, when you and I—like my brother—allow God to turn our mess into our message, He not only changes our lives, but He changes the lives of others too.

Dear Lord, Your mercy astounds me. Your goodness overwhelms me as I cry out "heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me and I will be saved." God, give me opportunities to speak of Your hope so that others may know Your goodness and salvation. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

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The Trials of Friendship

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother in born for adversity.” Proverbs 17:17 (NIV)

When I asked “Paula” if she could get together Thursday evening she declined. She and her mother already had plans.

A little while later I called “Dana” to see if she could hang out Thursday. You can imagine my shock when she said, “Sorry, I’m going to a dinner party at Paula’s. You’re not invited?”

Ouch! I couldn’t help but wonder why Paula felt she could not be honest with me. Dana said the party was small and Paula probably didn’t want to hurt my feelings. I understood, but being left out and lied to really hurt.

An uncomfortable knot sat in my stomach as I struggled with whether I should approach Paula or not.

We’d come to a crossroads in our friendship. I wanted to tell her, “It’s okay you didn’t invite me to your party but you didn’t have to lie to me. And I forgive you, because ‘a friend loves at all times.’” But I was too afraid.

At times like this, I follow my mom’s advice. “When you don’t know what to do, that’s your cue to pray.” God reminded me that when a “friend loves at all times” it means we believe the best about each other and work through problems.

Despite both my mom’s and God’s wisdom, I’m sad to say I decided to just let it go; I was too fearful to caringly confront my friend.

Paula called me a few weeks later. She felt bad for lying to me, apologized and explained the dinner party. I also apologized for not confronting her. I should have known our friendship was stronger than my fears.

We ended up laughing about our insecurities, and ourselves, because we knew we loved each other and wouldn’t intentionally hurt one another. She should have been honest and I should’ve been brave enough to ask her about it.

Lying isn’t supposed to be a part of friendship, but neither is fear. Every relationship will have its share of trials and mishaps. But it should also have its share of believing the best in each other and forgiveness.

When obstacles that aren’t dealt with come between two people, they can eat at our hearts, little by little. When we allow it to build up over time, our enemy will use it to divide us.

Perhaps the Lord is prompting you to tell the truth to a friend you’ve not been honest with. Or maybe you’re the one who’s been told a lie. Scripture tells us, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (Romans 12:18 NIV 1984). Whether telling the truth, or confronting a lie, it rests upon us to do whatever possible to reconcile with our friend.

You may be on the other end of a confession or confrontation that was not well received. I’m so sorry. I know it’s painful to lose a friend. But we can rest assured, that once we’ve done our part, the Lord will continue to do His and heal the wound left.

If you’re at a crossroads now, wondering if you should confess or caringly confront, may I encourage you to pray and take the next step? I am so glad Paula called me. What we have is too good to allow hurt feelings and misunderstandings to ruin it.

God’s Word tells us “a friend loves at all times.” That may not always be easy, but in the end, it’s worth it. In fact, I can honestly say our friendship is now even stronger than it was before.

Dear Lord, we can make life so much more complicated than it needs to be. Help us to be honest, be brave, and to love and forgive each other the way You do. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.


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